Christmas Eve started out the way I expected. Jeremey made us a huge yummy breakfast and I got to spend time on the computer. But then we got a phone call. Jeremey's dad called saying that Grandma had collapsed and was on her way to the hospital. Kevin had done CPR, but while they were at the house, they weren't able to get a heart beat or anything. We rushed to get ready, call my parents to meet us and get the kids, get everything ready for the kids' Christmas eve (can't forget a Santa present), bring the food for the party, making phone calls and trying to go as fast as we could without forgetting anything. It took us about an hour to get out the door and as we were walking out, we received a call that there wasn't a reason to rush anymore, that Grandma had passed. We met everyone at the hospital and got a chance to say goodbye. The kids went to my parents' house, we didn't tell them until the next day.
Grandma was an amazing woman. Whenever I saw her she had a friendly word and we could sit and chat as long as we wanted, she was even a good companion when you were craving a bit of silence. She managed much of what went on in that house perfectly. As long as I have known Jeremey, their family had dinner on the table at 5. Whomever was there would eat all together and no matter how many people were there, there was always enough. I was always amazed by her ability to have everything for a meal ready at the same time, to please so many plalates, to plan endless numbers of meals and to never take a day off. She cooked, she cleaned up (after a ton of people - particularly messy boys), she did never ending laundry and I never heard her complain. Early on in our relationship, I remember Jeremey telling me that she used to get him up for school, bring him breakfast on the couch so he could watch his cartoons and she would put blankets in the dryer to warm them up for him to cuddle with before he had to leave. She was really good at taking care of people.
We just celebrated her 85th birthday in October.
The kids seem to be taking it all in pretty well. Jack is pretty matter of fact about her being in heaven with Jesus, GG Bonnie (my grandma) and his fish. It's starting to sound like a pretty fun place to him. Grace didn't seem to really get it and that's fine, but on new year's day she asked where she was. We spent the night and in the morning the kids ate breakfast, while she was sitting at the table with Great Grandpa, she noticed that Great Grandma was missing. This is definitely the closest person to them that they have ever lost.
And I guess that's where we all are in our grieving right now, we feel like she is missing and we're definitely missing her.
2 comments:
I'm so sorry, that is awful for the whole family :( My thoughts go out to your family.
On another comment, Sam seems to take death very matter of factly but with a dog dying one year ago, a cat dying 6 months ago, she freaked out a little about the cat. We had a few crying nights of she 'missed' the cat. The cat whom she never paid attention to, it seemed very dramatic. But who am I to wonder how death affects people?
Our 2nd dog will be going soon (he has lymphoma) so I'm worried what she will do with that.
Thank you Kristi, it is so interesting to see how the kids handle death. They're much better at it than many adults are and it's refreshing to watch him remind others that she is still with us/ watching over us. I love the way he thinks about death. :)
I hope Sam won't miss her dogs too much, that's like loosing a member of the family. It's really hard to loose someone that you see every day.
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